brewers baseball and things

forbidden fruit bursting up from somewhere


A few months ago I discussed my bathroom here or not my bathroom, but a weed growing outside my bathroom window. It was May or June and the weed was kinda small. I even took a photo and insisted that by August it would be bigger. I felt confident saying so because the same weed had been there over the last 5 or 6 years and every year it grows.

Well, it’s September and I took another photo and that sucker is not Jack in the Bean Stalk big, but wild just the same. It’s beries2growing in a land locked swirl rather than up up and away and as the new photo reveals, there’s some sort of berries on some sort of vine or not vine but whatever we call fruit looking globes on plants or weeds or whatever this thing is.

I’m unnerved a bit because I keep the window open, but have no intention of eating one of the berries and not only because my neighbor tells me they’re poisonous. There’s a screen keeping me from touching them and anyway, I could buy real gapes at the grocery store or not real grapes but known grapes as opposed to unknown grapes.

Yes, these are unknown grapes, but I like imagining all the people, all our ancestors who sacrificed their lives in order to boldly go where no fruit and nut eater had gone before. Someone had to try all these foods before they get packaged and marketed with cute little slogans, before kids sat in shopping karts and smiled.

These test tasters in loin clothes were my heroes, but the other day after noticing those berries or grapes or whatever they were for the first time, I got to thinking and well….I stopped dead in my thought tracks or whatever and realized something

There mighta been much less courage and sacrifice than I first thought. I realized this while watching squirrels. I like watching squirrels because for one reason they give me tons of attention.They make me feel like a gangster with a pistol and a bad attitude; a wild west gunslinger, a well respected fugitive.

Those squirrels scamper off in hyper dart motion when I so much as blink an eye. That’s some deep respect. Praises be to squirrels, but this is me watching squirrels and learning from them; learning what’s ok to eat and what not. This is what our ancestors musta done; watched their animal brothers and sisters and learned what to eat; what to not eat.

If they don’t die, I don’t die and whatever they forage from the garbage, my stomach can adjust. All our stomachs can adjust to just about anything I would think. This is the very reason I eat a triple whopper with cheese every once in a while …to keep my stomach in shape in case one day I have to survive on 99 cent whoppers.

I also inhale bus fume exhaust at least once per day. Keep lungs flexible. I don’t eat antibiotics for the same reason. Maybe vegetarian life and meditation is not such a great idea; too much perfection and often times too much crusade. I don’t like crusades; subtle or otherwise.

Outer space has all kinds of meteors crashing into planets; all kinds of destruction, all the time. Who really knows squat!

I was watching for squirrels outside my bathroom window to see if they would eat the berries, but I can’t stand here all day. I should get a surveillance camera like they use inside a 7/11 store.

I’d like to do the same thing for tree roots and watch them burst through cement year after year. People build new driveways and sidewalks and the trees and their roots always win. Holes, cracks, and fissures.

I like it when roots destroy cement. It reminds me of a movie I saw many years ago. Frogs invaded a southern mansion; one with a big patio. There were so many frogs that people drowned. It was horrific in a natural frog sort of way.

The baseball season is an old southern mansion to me. There’s creaks in the floor for some teams and damp, humid smells; rodents dying in the walls type of smells. But through the window is a swimming pool party and some teams look fresh and relieved.

The Brewers are contracting towards a .500 record like shutters of a southern mansion; 12 losses in 13 games…the closing of summer and arrival of autumn and winter and death and zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz and Miami hit three home runs and scored 6 runs off Yovani Gallardo last night; all in the first 3 innings of the game. Final score; Marlins 6, Brewers 4.

The Brewers are 74-70.


Author: Steve Myers

I grew up in Milwaukee and have been a Milwaukee Brewers baseball fan for as long as I can remember.

8 thoughts on “forbidden fruit bursting up from somewhere

  1. “I was watching for squirrels outside my bathroom window to see if they would eat the berries, but I can’t stand here all day. I should get a surveillance camera like they use inside a 7/11 store.” Good line!

    Is the inhaling of carbon monoxide fumes from buses in order to take the place of the carbon monoxide fumes that were in the cigarettes that you used to smoke?

    The Brewers are starting to remind me of the 1964 Phillies.


    • Thanks Glen. Well, I’ve been making sure I take advantage of bus fumes since the early 1990’s. And now more than ever I gotta find some and enjoy the sweet exhaust since I no longer smoke cigarettes. I’m just glad we can enjoy a greasy burger. There’s plenty of diners in Montreal. One of my favorites is a place called the the green spot. It has booths and waitresses who work hard and they even show baseball on the tv..on Sunday nights anyway. The ad on the outside window says 10 hot dogs for 10 bucks. That’s like a scare crow. Scares away vegetarians and that’s fine by me.

    • the big difference with brewers and those phillies is that wild card possibility or wild cards plural nowadays. It seems so phony. I wouldn’t want to sneak in that way. I’d rather win the damn division. I guess anyone and everyone would, but I’m sure I would take it if the Brewers got in that way…like they did in 2008, but not in 2011. I much preferred 2011 when they finished first.. 2008 almost felt fake. I just can’t get into the wild card. It was one of many things that distinguished baseball from other sports and now all those distinctions are gone. Watered down coffee for money reasons I guess. Same with interleague play. I hate that.

  2. You know, to get all Dennis Green with it, the Brewers are who we thought they are, but they’re taking an excruciatingly roundabout way to prove it.

    • this brew season feels like a reticulation of the upturned mongoose; ya know…storm out of the gate 20 games over, then hit a cruising altitude of win loss win loss 500 follow y a fall of f the face of the earth. It’s actually kind of pleasant and predictable; fits the three seasons real well. Now go and beat those red turds would ya pirtate pisces of the fish that saves.

  3. 74:70. If I understand my statistics, that’s a lot closer than it has been…

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