brewers baseball and things

sleeping on the west jet


I’ve never had much luck with relationships; never had to many; never wanted to or never could; makes the one that lasts a real focused adventure; enjoyable too. I keep the perspective; aware of the alternative; loneliness. That shit can kill you. 

I don’t have much to say on this topic, but one time I was sitting on the bed after sex after not really enjoying it. I was too nervous I guess and just in a hurry to get it over with. And when the four minutes or whatever was finally over, I spoke about vacuum cleaners; not the stand alone kind that freak out dogs, but the central vacuum kind. That’s how this house was. Every room had a hole in the wall and the vacuum was an accordion snake that easily dragged from room to room. You just plugged the sucker in the wall and it sucked up all the dust and raced down tubes hidden in the wall I guess; to a central place in the basement; maybe a bucket. I was blown away.

Maybe I was supposed to get us some water or a piece of chocolate cake. I don’t know. I had no idea. I still don’t. We were so far away like two separate countries with sheets all ruffled up making mountains between us. Maybe the vacuum conversation was a turn off.

There were no broken windows or loud screams or tragic love poems after a year together; just that awkward silence and big relief; like being laid off and knowing you got 5 months to sit on your ass and do nothing and think and say whatever the hell you want and get paid too.

The Brewers owner arrived from his home town Los Angeles the other day. His name is Mark Atanaassio (spelling?) His wife Debbie has become a big Brewers fan. We see the two of them on TV when they come to town to check up on their little investments running around the Milwaukee field. She can’t watch certain pitches. Too much pressure I guess.

Mark announced that the Brewer starting the season out so bad was not the manager or general manager’s fault. He appeared on the telecast Wednesday night for about an inning and announced that it was the players fault. He didn’t give names or provide any details, but maybe it was an error here or there and a missed sac bunt or pitchers walking batters. I don’t know. It’s kind of weird because those things happen when the Brewers win and yet he stays in Los Angeles and all is hunky dory. Maybe it’s a save face marketing thing. I don’t know.

Anyway, it was kind of funny because when Mark appeared on the telecast Jimmy Nelson our ace was pitching and he was pumped up; red cheeks popping like a trumpet player and fist clenching as he came off the mound. He matched Johnny Cueto pitch for pitch. Score was tied 1-1 in the 8th inning I think, but then Frankie Rodriguez wild pitched in the winning run.

It wasn’t a walk off wild pitch since we were at home but we had to face Aroldis Chapman in the 9th inning and well, same thing with his 103 mph fast ball and it’s not just believing the radar adding to all the visual pollution on the TV screen. It’s not cartoon smoke rising either. It’s batters swinging way too late. Mark was not around to comment on the wild pitch.

But anyway, the next day-Thursday afternoon, The Brewers broke the losing streak; 9 games i think. It was the usual culprits, Million dollar free agents and million dollar trade acquisitions. Kyle Lohse with the 7 inning win and Johnny Broxton a hold. Frankie recorded the save. Easy street. Adam Lind the new guy from the trade  and Aramis Ramirez the guy we signed a few years ago to replace Prince Fielder both hit home runs.

Mark must feel good all about this and his wife Debbie too. They’re back in Los Angeles now.

The Brewers are 3-13.


Author: Steve Myers

I grew up in Milwaukee and have been a Milwaukee Brewers baseball fan for as long as I can remember.

10 thoughts on “sleeping on the west jet

  1. I hope the owners are happy. Not happy with the third win and the others that will follow, but happy. It would be sad if they owned a baseball team two thousand miles east (and had great seats at the yard) and weren’t happy. Sort of like the folks in the McMansions who take the elegance of central vacuum systems for granted.

    • I’d prefer an owner who was pissed off from time to time. Just because he has tons of money and a great seat doesn’t oblige him to be the prozac cover boy. That happiness thing seems more than a little fishy; to me anyway.

  2. Speaking of sex and vacuum cleaners…my wife (Yes, I know, who woulda thunk?) once worked with an insurance concern. She related to me the story of one claim where a gemtleman had to go to the ER when his testicles got caught in a Dirt Devil. Apparently, his missus had been “playfully vacuuming him.” Kids, do not try this at home.

  3. This got to me thinking about the awkwardness of one night stands after the tension is released. Yikes!

    I’d have to disagree with the owner on this one…your G.M. sat on his hands month after month knowing they had to make a few moves to compete.

    • I know as much about how a baseball team really operates as I do the female anatomy or Argentine economics, but if i had to guess I’d say Mark Anatasteityo (spelling?) doesn’t decide on whether or not to pay for new players or trade for them or whatever or at least I hope not because he doesn’t seem like a baseball or algorithm junky; more of a marketing business guy; an already upward professional. Yeh, yikes.

  4. Sex, vacuum cleaners, and baseball. Steve, you’ve outdone yourself. Most of these owner types are really just guys that found themselves in these improbable circumstances, and are just faking it to get by. Kind of like how I’ve lived my entire life (without the added benefit of actually owning a team.)

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