The mile markers on US highways are vertical metal strips if I remember right and designed in part to be a GPS for tanks after nuclear devastation or maybe not. Either way, an extra terrestrial landing would hopefully put an end to World Cup rah rah events playing their soft core ethnic wars.
Assuming this extra terrestrial gang was into languages, maybe like C3PO and all the tongues the gold droid could speak….there might be a few baseball cities and their names preserved.
People would hopefully be eliminated for the same reasons the World Cup is War. So New York, named after the Duke of York would have to go and so would Houston named after Sam Houston, Pittsburgh for William Pitt and so on.
Team names like Red Sox and White Sox? What if the ET’s don’t wear socks? There are Cubs and Tigers in more places than Chicago and Detroit. A Phillie is kind of redundant. City of Angels? Athletics are everywhere. Ditto for Cardinals, Orioles, and Blue Jays. Chief Seattle was a person. Giants is nice, but screwed by Saint Francis.
Texas ain’t bad; comes from Caddo word Tejas which means friends, but Rangers might freak em out. Miami is named after more than a person. The Mayaimi people and Marlins are a fish, but there are Marlins in more than Mayaimi.
Tampa is believed to be stick of fire in Calusa language, but same limitation with Rays. Kansas is Sioux word for south wind people. Throw in city, but that Royal might confuse the ET’s who hopefully would have no idea what that was.
I went through all the teams without a scrap of ET’s clothing stuffed in a desk drawer beside reading glasses, but felt empathy for the ET’s anyway. I came up with four team names that might provide some GPS to them.
Minnesota means clear water in Dakota language and Twins is well…twins. Colorado-red brown silt carried by the river and Rockies-Rocky Mountains. Arizona for arid zone and Diamondbacks-Snakes. And Milwaukee-Gathering place by the Rivers and Brewers as in brewery where beer is made.
But silt and beer and clear water and snakes are also everywhere. It’s probably easier to be critical.
Washington is the most World Cup patriotic gotta go name of all baseball teams or maybe not if you consider the hairdo of George Washington as being white dred locks, but Washington didn’t wear the fake hair lock amendments or at least nothing too obvious in any of the pictures I seen.
Either way, the name Nationals screws it up. Poor team had to deal with the Expos for a name and now the Nationals. They’ve never been in a World Series. That’s another name that might have to be changed; World Series to maybe Diamond Trophy, but the thing could be made from recycled beer cans or something.
The Nationals play at Nationals Park and like any other stadium, major league or minor, university and some high school and little league too there’s well manicured green grass, a big obnoxious scoreboard and probably an electric batting cage machine in the stadium’s belly.
People gorge themselves with food and teams take infield and batting practice with a real pitcher, fungo bats. They play simulation baseball and do all those practice things, but the ET’s would want to see the game or eat the game or something.
The Brewers played the Nationals Friday night to kick off what feels like opening day number 2 after the all star break, but then again, it doesn’t feel like opening day at all with crickets already doing mating fertility procreation ritual sounds, louder than the same question asked three times in the same question.
Kyle Lohse who was snubbed from the NL all Star team probably a good thing with rejection spurring him forward in a fantasy of his own achievements. Lohse pitched 7 innings and allowed 10 hits, but didn’t walk any one and escaped Houdini style from one jam after another. The bullpen must have enjoyed the 5 day rest.
Rob Wooten and Zach Duke took care of the eighth inning; no hits. Frankie Rodriguez continued his slide; serving up a ninth inning home run to Bryce Harper, but struck out two of the last three batters to save the game.
A few weeks ago, Scooter Gennet hit a grand slam of National’s super hyped ace Steven Strasburg. He hit another home run off him last night. A few weeks ago Khris Davis also hit a homer off Strasburg and he did it again last night too. Final Score; Brewers 4, Nationals 2.
The Brewers are 54-43.